REVIEW: Paul Blart Mall Cop

MOVIE

Paul Blart Mall Cop

CAST

Kevin James, Jayma Mays

RELEASE

January 16, 2009

RATING

PG

STUDIO

Columbia Pictures

RUNNING TIME

1 hr 27 mins

GRADE

A

STARS

****

REVIEW

The only thing I can say about Paul Blart is the following: HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kevin James stars as Paul Blart, a single father who tries out to be a cop for the New Jersey State Police. He does suprisingly well even though he is incredibly large. Just as he's about to finish the obsticle course, he passes out due to hypoclemina, which means he needs sugar to get him up and running. Due to him passing out, he fails the test. Ever since his wife left him, Paul lives with his mom and daughter, who encourage him to look for the perfect women. Paul works as a "mall cop" (hense the title) at the West Orange Pavillion Mall. He takes his job really serious. One day he meets a girl named Amy and starts crushing on her. After a little accident at the bar, Paul thinks Amy doesn't like him. He gets rid of his moping by going into the game room on Black Friday and starts playing Rock Band (BOO YAH!!!) While he's doing that the entire mall is exiting the building and a few are being held hostage by burgalars. The movie is something to laugh at while you are in the theater and trust me, you and your family will blow up with laughter when you see this movie. It is worth every penny you spend (At least to me).

Review: "Hotel for Dogs"

MOVIE
Hotel For Dogs
CAST
Emma Roberts, Jake .T. Austin
RELEASE
January 16, 2009
RATING
PG
DIRECTOR
Thor Freudenthal
STUDIO
Dreamworks Pictures, Nickelodeon Movies
RUNNING TIME
1hr 40min


GRADE

C

STARS

**

REVIEW

Hotel for dogs is a movie that younger kids (like my sister) would enjoy. However, I have a different perspective about that. Hotel for dogs is about two orphans living in a foster home. While there they're keeping a stray dog named Friday in secrecy from their foster parents. They have to be really careful of Friday since if a dog catcher finds him guess where he goes... THE POUND!!!! That's when the kids decide Friday needs to live someplace better. Then, while the kids are hiding from the police, Friday finds a hiding place inside an old, abandoned hotel. While the kids search in the hotel for Friday, they come across two other stray dogs. Throughout the movie are the two orphans meeting 3 other kids and they all build a "hotel for dogs." Little kids will love this movie. Parents might if they like nickelodeon, dogs, and strange relationships. The things that really upset me the most was all of the bland, kiddy jokes. For example, the foster parents land in a dumpster full of turd so one of the foster parents said, "we've been turdified" or something like that. Plus, the romances in the movie were extremely obvious. The only part that made me laugh, which was only a small chuckle was the dog romance between the dogs named "Romeo" and "Juliet"(Ooh ruff ruff). There are better movies out there this weekend, like the Kevin James movie Paul Blart Mall Cop. This would actually be the last choice I'd make to go see a movie this week. But if it's something that's on your list for the week, don't let me stop you. But if you were like me and will actually listen to what I'm saying, do the cheap solution and wait for this movie on DVD (or blu-ray if you like stinking HD). There's no reason to see this movie in theaters, but people will still do so anyway. Heck, there's no reason to see this movie at all since this is a hardcore kids movie and possibly won't be enjoyed by any parent who's dragged to see it. So as the first review on my blog, Hotel For Dogs is already the worst movie that I've seen in 2009. By any means skip this movie or wait for the home video release. Otherwise, you'll suffer the regret of going to see this movie instead of spending money on something much more worthwhile.

Welcome to my blog

I'm Zach. I just turned 12 years old, and I've been paying attention to movies for as long as I can remember. I keep track of what new movies are coming out, and what's interesting and special about them. I've decided to share my thoughts on this blog. Happy reading!